jaded_hopeless (jaded_hopeless) wrote in slashypunkboys,
Title:In the Beginning

Author:jaded_hopeless

Pairing: Pete/Patrick

Rating: PG

Summary: See, it all started with a dream, a belief. It all started with the idea that the four of them could do something, could be something.

Disclaimer: made it all up, don't own anything that follows except the order of the words

A/n: first bandom in over a year. hope it works.



See, it all started with a dream, a belief. It all started with the idea that the four of them could do something, could be something. It all started with sleepless nights and prayers muttered and offered up to an entity that Patrick never quite bought.

It all started with Pete's words, honeyed and practiced.

"We'll rule the world someday Patrick. You'll see because you'll be there."

And Patrick bought into it like a desperate man buys into faith.

Or something like that.

But it wasn't exactly a line because they'd done it. They'd become a household name. And if the fact that Patrick had seen 27 magazines in the convenience store down the street and Fall Out Boy had been on the cover of 18 of them meant anything- well they kind of had the whole "conquer the world" thing in the bag.

And there are still days when Patrick looks in the mirror and wonders how all this happened to an awkward 16-year-old who would rather eat, sleep, and breathe music than interact with the world at large.

But even that's changed. He's producing now, meeting new people, cracking jokes, taking charge of situations.

And Pete- well ok, Pete didn't make Patrick that way because that's always been his personality. But Pete helped. Pete brought it out. And these days Patrick feels a lot more at home in his own skin than he ever had previously.

Or ever thought he would.

And Pete- well Pete looked pretty damn happy. Not that Patrick had never seen Pete happy. But his periods of absolute happiness were lasting longer and longer and getting more and more intense.

And Patrick's not 16 anymore so the fact that it's not him causing Pete's happiness shouldn't burn.

But it does, just a little way in the very back of his mind.

The part of him that remembers arms wrapped tight around him in the dark cloistering space of the van. That part of him that wakes him in the middle of the night gasping and sweating and feeling ghost fngers running down his chest.

The part of him that watches Pete playing his bass and hears in the back of his mind:

Patrick, with you anything is possible. You have no idea the keys you hold do you?

And no, Patrick hadn't known what that meant, still didn't. But Pete had kissed him on the cheek and laughed and that he's pretty sure he understands.

Pretty sure.

But he's not so sure he understands Pete these days. Which is odd because he made it his mission in life to understand everything Pete said and did.

But he is clear on one thing- he doesn't hate or resent Ashlee. He saw it coming, maybe before Pete even did.

And he still has the band, while it lasts. He still has this before Pete decides that marriage and a baby and a world famous band are too much and whoa...

Where did that come from?

Because he knows Pete, he knows that this band means the world to Pete. He knows that the fans mean the world to Pete.

"You know you mean the world to me right?"

It's Pete, low in his ear, arms wrapping around him and Patrick shivers just the tiniest bit.

He smiles, even though he knows Pete can't see it standing behind him and says, "I do?"

Patrick feels Pete bury his face at the place where his neck meets his shoulder and say, "You should."

And they stand there, in the deserted bathroom of the restaurant where they're having a band meeting- Pete's arms locked around Patrick's middle and Patrick desperately wants to say something, but he doesn't want to ruin the moment. And then the door opens and Pete's arms drop rapidly and Patrick feels cold.

"You guys coming back?" It's Joe, Patrick can see him reflected in the mirror. He has one eyebrow raised and his voice sounds skeptical but of what Patrick isn't sure.

"Yeah," Pete says easily, "be right there."

Joe eyes them- expression changing to wary, then shrugs and leaves.

Patrick watches Pete in the mirror silently.

"Patrick," Pete says softly, "Everything's gonna be fine. You'll see." He steps close again, nuzzling Patrick's neck and Patrick's eyes slide shut. There's a kiss, soft on his neck and then he can feel Pete stepping away.

Patrick opens his eyes and turns around. Pete is standing by the door, hand reaching out and Patrick takes it, closes his fingers around Pete's and revels in the tingling sensation that travels through his hand and up his spine.

"See?" Pete says and Patrick tilts his head.

"See what?"

"That connection is still there, you can feel it."

Patrick smiles slow and maybe a bit of the sadness he's been feeling seeps through because Pete says, "Nothing's changing Patrick."

"How can it not?" And yeah, that's his voice that comes out like that all high and needy.

Pete laughs. "Yeah ok. Well, some things will change. But this," he gestures between the two of them with their joined hands, "this can't change."

Pete leans in and kisses Patrick, the kiss just this side of friendly and pulls away to whisper, "you still have all those keys."

Then he turns and puts a hand on the door. "The keys to what?" Patrick asks, lips still tingling.

Pete half turns and it's his turn to smile sadly as he shakes his head. "To everything. Don't you get it?"

And then he's gone through the door and Patrick's is still standing there staring stupidly at the door that's still swinging.

See everything started with a dream, with a belief. Everything started with the idea that Pete knew what he was doing when he picked the four of them and threw them together. But what Patrick is just starting to understand is that everything hinges on them, on him and Pete. Everything depends upon their relationship, on the delicate balance between them, the intricate dance they do. The sliding of Pete's lyrics into his music and really that shouldn't make Patrick blush because it wasn't meant to be dirty.

Honestly.

Not that that never happened. The uh sliding of lyrics into music.

It did because it was Pete and everything he touched became sexual.

It did because it was Patrick and Patrick believed in every idea Pete had.

[well, almost every. That whole trip to best buy was suspect]

And that dream- well it was realized. So where do you go with a dream when it's happened?

Pete's driving Patrick back to his place after the band meeting, and Patrick traces music notes on the window and asks Pete, "So where do you go with a dream when it's happened?"

And Pete, without blinking, responds, "You make it reoccurring."

And it's that moment that Patrick believes that everything will be ok.

After all, it all started with them believing Pete's words and why stop now?
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